Let’s stereotype for a change!
Sure, we all know, women and men are different. Men are from Mars and women are from the nearest shopping mall or whatever. Men are rational and women emotional, I know.
Men forget the anniversaries and women remember and get hurt when men don’t remember. Yeah yeah, old news.
But let’s dive into this anniversary-dilemma a bit deeper, since it might explain some hurt feelings, hunched shoulders, silent treatments or withholding of sex (hey, I know, the last part probably grabbed your attention!).
True, some men don’t remember it and that leads to conflict. Equally true, not all women remember it either. That doesn’t usually create as much drama as the other way around though… 😉
Sure, there are men who are passionate about anniversaries and women who couldn’t care less what day it is.
But for those women that remember it and want, require and need their spouses to remember The Day (whatever it is – a first date, one year, first-time-we-shared-an-ice-cream, 10 years), the negligence is actually a grave crime, punishable by some horrible deeds (remember Gone Girl , the treasure hunt? Hell, the whole story?!).
And here’s why: for (these) women the day is significant, since it carries with it the memory of the feeling of that particular day. And that’s no small thing.
The anniversary, whatever it is about, has to do with what you did as a couple, shared something, hopefully had deep emotions and loving feelings.
The anniversary reminds the woman of what it felt like.
And when the other person, who was part of that significant day/occasion, forgets it, s/he insults the memory, diminishes it.
And when you do that to feelings, you might brake something really bad. And if not brake, you hurt it, create a chip in the china, leave a scratch.
So, before the next anniversary catches up with you, make a note somewhere, a reminder here, set an alarm there to avoid hurting the feelings. How you remember the day or how you celebrate it is not that important compared to just simply remembering it.
(Although this of course depend on you and your significant other. For some it’s candle-light-dinner-roses-diamonds, for some it’s a long walk talking, for some it’s watching a movie together or a long, deep discussion).
Do you remember your anniversaries and if yes, how? Simply by the date or need some additional help like a calendar, personal assistant or string on your finger?